I stand on the side of humanity.

I keep seeing these posts on line titled: “what radicalized me was” and I always think to myself- nothing radicalized me. This is the core of who I am. I am a kind, compassionate, empathetic, non-racist, non-bigoted, non-homophobic, non-classist, non ableist etc. etc. person. 

And that is partly true. However I have also learned that I am racist, bigoted, homophobic, classist person also. 

But more on that in a bit. 

What I’ve recently realized though,  is that I have had a turning point of being radicalized. Radicalized meaning: “Radicalization, is the process by which an individual or a group comes to adopt increasingly radical views in opposition to a political, social, or religious status quo. The ideas of society at large shape the outcomes of radicalization. Radicalization can result in both violent and nonviolent action” -wikipedia. 

And that turning point was 6 years ago, almost to this month, and it was due to doing a deep dive study with our lil homeschool group on immigration to the United States. 

It was then that I learned that this country has always been hateful to those that are different. Each wave of immigrants from different countries over the years, were always met with disdain, as the outsider, as ‘less than”, dirt bags even. 

Instead of being met with roads paved with gold, and the American dream that was propagandized throughout the world, each wave of immigrants from Jewish, to Irish, to Asian were most commonly met with hatred. Coming to better their lives, only to be poor, and work the jobs that the upper, already-established white class was too good for. 

Of course you can never blanket statement anything. Sometimes the awful life here, still outweighed the awful life in their country of origin. Sometimes they were welcomed and treated well, and some really did make the “American Dream” a reality for themselves. But by and large, most immigrants were treated like garbage by the colonizers that came before them. 

Now you might say to yourself, how could THAT be the thing that radicalized you when you knew of of the terrible, horrific things that were done to the Indigenous tribes already living and established here in North America? Wiped out through disease, brutally killing, wiping out the indigenous animals that fed the people, stealing the land, and raping the women and children!

Why was that not enough?

Well, as a white woman living in the twenty first century, being raised on white washed history, things tend to come in layers, and I had already accepted that layer of genocide. Accepted in the sense that I thought I already understood the underpinnings of this country because I was aware of that genocide. 

Then came the immigration study happened and I was so appalled to find out how immigrants have always been treated here, and that ties in deeply to the lower class anyhow they are treated. 

Quite literally only a few days after that study ended, the United States shut down due to the Covid pandemic. 

The next few years, to current day, proved to me what I already knew:  the govt. cannot be trusted. I did not see, hear, feel, sense that they were working to protect us. I saw the terrible decisions being made about whose lives were worth protecting and whose weren’t: spoiler alert in case you missed it: poor people and disabled people’s lives are not important. 

Although, they were ESSENTIAL to keep things running. They were the grocery store clerks, the gas station workers, the people that didn’t have enough money to take any time off, or have work from home jobs. So they were forced to be in the public day in and day, all the while being exposed to a deadly virus. They were poor, but essential, therefore being sacrificed to the Covid gods.

The poor have always been sacrificed. The poor are always “essential” in that way. The country has to have poor people for this reason. So we can throw them to the fire when needed, as well as to pour gasoline on them when we need to create chaos to fight each other. There is nothing like, hungry, hostile, got-nothing-to-lose people to fight battles for the government even when the government isn’t actually taking care of them and instead, actually harming them. 

The psychology of politics is nothing to be scoffed at. It is a masterclass. 

And then came the Black Lives Matter movement. 

That movement changed me forever.

It called my soul to step forward and pull that next layer back-the layer(S) of racism I didn’t really know.

So instead of looking away thinking: ’I’m already an ally,” I decided to do an entire homeschool year on social justice topics. 

One thing we studied with intensity was racism, (as it pertains mainly to the United States). However, we also did a deep dive into WWII and the holocaust. Although I didn’t realize I was educating myself on what was to come in this country. 

The things that stuck out to me about how racism works, are that in order to make it work, people are dehumanized. Meaning, the reason we as humans can beat, rape, have other humans as slaves, torture and kill, is because we began to see each other as less than human.That narrative is fed through history and throughout different ethnicities. 

 For The USA white colonizers began the narrative that black people are animals, subhuman, and don’t feel pain. 

And to this day in the 21st century we dehumanize each other all the time. Any time you create a narrative of me vs you, you’ve engage with dehumanizing. Making the other person less than. 

But back to the dehumanizing of black people so we could use them as slaves. You might be saying to yourself: w”ell that was a long time ago, we don’t have to continue to bring that up or feel bad about it anymore, black people are not dehumanized anymore and have all the same rights as everyone else.”

Except that they don’t. 

Did you know, that to this very day in 2026, black people get less pain meds in medical care because they are still seen as ‘feeling less pain?” Which has never been proven factual by science. Ever. 

Did you know that Gynecology was founded by a white man doing unmedicated practices on enslaved black women in Alabama? The most noted one named Anarcha Westcott, whom had at least THIRTY UN-ANESTHETIZED medical experiments done on her female parts. 

And even after all that, did you know that black women have the highest mortality birth rate because they get less consideration and care in the Obgyn field? As if they don’t matter as much. Still. Right now. To this day. In 2026. 

How does this happen? Because they were dehumanized. White people have told themselves lies after lies, in order to be able to do horrific things to other human beings that don’t look the same, or act the same, or believe the same. All in the name of keeping power and money. 

It’s always about that.

Every. single. time. 

Over the past 6 years, I learned that any time people of color try to rise up to equality, or get ahead in their own communities and lives, white people have come along and quite literally bombed and or bulldozed them. 

You should check out the true history of how New York’s Central Park came to be, (search Seneca Village). 

And the Tulsa race massacre.

And there are many, many more stories like these all over our country not only about entire black communities being wiped out, but black individuals being scapegoated and murdered, like Emmitt Till, and still happening: George Floyd, Breonna Tayler, Sonya Massey, Elijah McClain. That list can go on forever. 

You know the women’s suffrage movement? While I love that story of women fighting for women’s, rights, except for one NOT-SO-MINOR detail: It did not include black womens rights. They had to have their own movement.

Did you know that when we “all” got voting rights, including black people, that black people could be subjected to having to take a random literacy test first, decide by a random person? And guess how often those tests were accurately scored so that  that black person could cast their vote? And did you know that black people often had to pay to vote, while white people did not. And guess how many black people could afford to vote in the 1870’s?

And if you think that sort of thing has ended- come on Jamie MOVE ON! 

Well guess what, these types of voter manipulations continue to occur.  Gerrymandering, (manipulating electoral boundaries to give one side or the other more electoral votes),has been going on since we came up with the electoral vote system and  is quite literally happening in the USA at this very moment in 2026! Literally being voted on in several states as you read this!

As well as Voter suppression: which involves tactics that make it difficult for specific groups of people to register to vote. Specifically minorities. Voter suppression was actively used in the last election.

 So no, we haven’t left racist practices in the 1800s. They are very much alive and well. 

Honestly, I could write forever about these topics because I have spent the last 6 years, reading books, articles, listening to the voices of people of color, participating in activism trainings, watching videos and talking to my non-white friends that are graciously willing to have the hard conversations with me. But I can’t possibly fit it all on a FB post. 

During the Black lives matter movement, I called a long time friend (that is black) and I asked, are you open to sharing with me what it’s like to raise black children, especially your son, (because I have 3 son’s and was curious about  the difference)?

That was when she told me the rules of raising black males. Such as- don’t wear a hoodie up in public. Always keep your hands out of your pockets in public. Always get a receipt before leaving a store. And many, many more. 

I assure you my white sons wear their hoodies up, with their hands in their pockets all the time!  And, I taught my boys to not get bags in stores when they don’t need them. So they walk out of any given store with unbagged merchandise, with or without a receipt in plan sight, all.the.time. 

These rules for black men are so they don’t get killed. It is that extreme.

And then she asked me a question. She said: “When you take road trips, how do you plan out your trips?” I asked what she meant? And she said, well do you get to simply put it into your GPS and go where it takes you? I responded: “Yes, but I prob. Look for the quickest route.”  She responded;

“Jamie. I have to first talk with a network of black people that live around the country to know where I can safely stop for gas or not. I have to make sure I have enough gas to get to safe destinations.” 

I was flabbergasted to say the least. She then said: It’s time you learned about Sundown towns. 

This conversation happened in 2021, not hundreds of years ago.

So here’s where I’m going to seemingly completely change gears, but I promise I will connect all the dots, if you will just hang with me. 

Before the Black lives matter movement, before the immigration study, me and the kiddos did a deep dive into women’s history. 

It was then that I learned, how often women have been the founders, the discoverer, and the inventor of so many advancements in technology, science, medicine, art and everything! But rarely identified as such. because a man always was there to steal the spotlight. 

Everything from computers, to the game monopoly. 

And if the credit wasn’t stolen and given to a man, that’s because the woman pretended to be a man in order to do what she needed to do. Often times to be able to fight in war. Joan of Arc anyone? But there are many other woman that have done heroic things, while pretending to be men, just to help the cause they believed in, or to do other important work like make discoveries and write books. 

And did you know that to this day most studies of anything are done on white males? Not women. Not various races and ethnicities. White.males. 

Due to that disparity in studies things happen such as far more females die in car crashes then males, because seatbelts have only been studied to fit mens sizes and physiques. 

And menstrual products weren’t even studied and created using actual blood. They used water to see how absorbent pads and tampons are. Blood and water do not absorb the same. So women have been using products that don’t even work very well, not to mention they have been loaded with cancer causing chemicals. AND female products cost more than male products. From deodorant, to body washes, to lotion. It’s called the pink tax. 

Other examples of things studied on white male bodies only or mainly: medical devices, prosthetics, tennis shoes, and even many, if not most, of the DSM Diagnostic and statistical manual of of mental disorders. 

Except, the first version of ‘crazy’ came to be because women who were uncontrollable by men. 

Women who spoke up and spoke out. 

Have you ever seen the contraption made in the 17th century, called the Scold’s bridal? Search that term for a visual. 

It was created to stop women from talking. 

But the women being crazy part of my learning journey didn’t come from the homeschool journey, it came with my spiritual journey of learning about and venerating my ancestors. 

Learning about my lineages in Germany, Netherlands, England, Italy, Norway, Denmark, Scotland, Ireland Spain and Puerto Rico.

I learned a lot about a lot of things, particularly about how there undeniably was a world before Christ. And that world was full of humans practicing Animism and cultures of matriarchy. Communities that were centered around not only women, but healers, intuitive, seers. A communal practices ceremony and ritual- in song, dance, and working in reciprocity with the earth. 

Their was respect of the elders and tribal mentality that we all take care of each other. Much like wolves do. When wolves move in a pack, they let the eldest and the sick/slowest lead because they can only go as fast as them, so as not to leave them behind. This is how humans used to honor one another as well.

Women used to gather in red tents and tend to one another during our menstrual cycles, pregnancy and birth and beyond. 

You can see evidence of these cultures in ancient artifacts all over the world. 

And then in the 17th century came along came the protestant reformation, Industrialization, the scientific method, and modern warfare. All of those things demolishing the existence of community culture, ritual, ceremony and matriarchy. 

Christianity in particular was extremely damaging as a male-centered religion that forced women into submission, and put white men at the center of everything. 

And here is where we also find connections to poverty and using poor people as fuel, but acting as charity. My understanding is that a big way Christianity spread was by proselytizing to poor people that needed something to cling to, that needed something to feel big and important, men especially liked it because it put them in the seat of power, especially when feeling disempowered by poverty. At least they could control their women and household, if nothing else. 

Therefore, abuse of women became prevalent in the world, in order to ‘put women in their rightful place.” Although we have story telling evidence of abuses as far as Greek and Roman Mythology. The story of Medusa (and many others) are such tales of abusing women. 

And as women didn’t stop speaking up and didn’t want to have sex with their husbands etc. were deemed as hysterical and thats where the word ‘hysteria’ originated from. That’s where ‘crazy’ became a thing. Women that wouldn’t stand down and wouldn’t have sex with their abusive spouses were in hysteria and then put into institutions (some of the first psychiatric institutions were founded on this). 

Other ones were founded to subdue and stolen Indigenous children and force them into Catholicism. 

And lets not forget the demonization of women through Christianity, the story of Eve, and Mother Mary and Mary Magdalene are not what you think. 

Why are women always scorned and bad in religion?

Why has there never been women leaders such as a female Jesus, Joseph Smith, Buddha? 

Why has there never been a woman president in the United States of America after 300 years. 

Oh and  Fun fact, The witch trails, were not because of actual witches. That was a made up word to demonize women that were unmarried or widows, and that spoke out against wrongs in society, and were educated on things such as herbalism and old healing ways.

The witch hunts were also a land grab.

So let me begin to circle all this around, if I haven’t lost you yet. 

Our planet is first and foremost is a living breathing entity unto itself. It teems with life, beauty, and everything needed by any life it sustains from microbes, to plants, animals and humans. (Or at least it used to). 

And humans have been inhabiting this beautiful place for millinea and in forms, cultures communities well before the story of Christ. And those cultures thrived in reciprocity with the earth and other life present. 

They thrived in matriarchs, honored not only women, but the gender spectrum (Indigenous cultures have honored that spectrum forever; and also a nod to the fact that hundreds of species of animals and plants are hermaphroditic). Revered as well were spiritual practices of all kinds, and thriving in community. 

Then along came Christianity, the patriarchy, and colonization. And those things turned the human species inside out and upside down in order to place white men at the top, and everyone else as less than human. 

And for hundreds of years, people of color. women, the disabled,  and the queer community, have been the scapegoat of the power and money hungry grab of white supremacy. 

I haven’t even covered the layers of history of the queer community, or deeply enough about the indigenous cultures and the egregious things that have done to those minority groups in the name of white supremacy. 

What I have learned so truly in the past 6 years of study, after study, is that The United States of America is founded on white men desperate for control. (It’s not the only country like that. Christian Colonization and white supremacy has spread far and wide). 

nd that power and money hunger stands on racism, classism, misogyny and Eugenics. 

*(Here’s where Insert that the my most recent and not yet studied enough layer is about the disabled community and eugenics. Covid and this administration have peeled back that layer for me to see now.)

And the people that stand on those things the most are of course white men, but also white women. 

What’s wild about the white woman aspect of this, is we are an oppressed minority also. We have been abused, disempowered, raped, beat and killed by men FOREVER. 

Women and their families are killed in vast majority by white men. White men are the number one school shooters, or any mass shooting shooter. 

This is a lot. I know.

 But here’s an inserted story time to tell you how I know I’m racist and classist: 

My youngest son wanted to enter public school after being homeschooled his entire life (through 7th grade so far). He wanted the experience. There was really only one school we were willing to let him go to for a number of reasons.

So the school we were interested is a small charter school. When we toured it, I absolutely noticed that my son would be a minority as a white child. And as we walked through the school, I heard the voice in my head’ “Your child will be with mainly black and latino children, does that feel safe?” And then, because of my research of the school,I also noted and heard in my mind: “Your child will be amongst mostly children in poverty, does that feel safe?” 

And I didn’t just hear these things easily, it was with horror that I realized I had unchecked racism and classism and I told myself I would need to revisit that in depth later and I put it in a folder marked; “you’re probably a bad person.” 

After we got home I immediately did some deep diving into my mind and heart and soul and asked myself the tough questions. 

1. Are you afraid of black people Jamie? And immediately my mind and heart said, NO! And I knew it was truth, and I knew that what I had heard in my mind at the school was internalized racism that somewhere along the life of being a white person I had ingested; but it did not resonate with me and I needed to clear myself of that fear that doesn’t belong to me. 

The second question I asked myself was: 

2. Are you afraid of poor people Jamie? And the answer was YES. A little bit. Not really me so much, but I was afraid for my son. And the reason why is because I have studied mental health and all these things I’ve shared here, and I know that statically speaking people that live in poverty have harder, more stressful lives, and therefore tend to have higher rates of addiction and abuse. So my fear is that these children, to no fault of their own, are likely (NOT a guarantee), in homes with addiction and abuse whether they are witnessing it and/or experiencing it,  and I was afraid my son could became a victim to those victims? 

The classism I faced within myself was extremely uncomfortable. 

I navigated myself through this realizing that wealthy people are super fucked up also and just as likely to abuse, do drugs etc. My child was not safe from those things or experiences because of the school they go to. But in fact maybe safer at this smaller school that has strict rules about the kids being alone etc. 

I insert this story here because we did choose to send our son to the school, and he is indeed a minority in multiple ways, which I actually think is fantastic and think all white people should have that experience in their life. And he’s thriving. 

But you know what I realized? My son is likely safer from mass shootings by being in a school with less white males. 

Let that sink in. 

This is quite a journey, I know. It all ties together in more ways than I am able to express in this one post. Honestly I’m sharing the basics, believe it or not.

Lets bring it back to white women standing by white men that harm through racism, classism, homophobia, etc etc. 

They do it because of their proximity to privilege. 

White women are definitely the next foremost group to experience privilege, even if it’s at an oppressed level. Even when they are poor white women- therefore oppressed and used by the men and the government on multiple levels. 

Black and brown bodies have been brutalized, maimed, shot, raped and killed forever, and it’s accepted in our society. No matter how often it happens, white people turn it around on them. And that’s not to say that people of color don’t do these same horrific things to white people. They do. Statistically much less though, and more often amongst their own community. But white male supremacy is very real and has always run this country. It’s a proven tale as old as time.

Unfortunately for white women, the tables have now turned. 

What we just witnessed two days ago was the shock of all shock to many white women in our country - an innocent white woman was gunned down by a white man. 

What this means white women, is that we are no longer going to be killed quietly behind closed doors, where most people won’t find out. We are now being killed by white men, openly in the streets while they walk away and call us a “Fucking Bitch!”

If there was one thing that man that just killed Renee Nicole Good has always wanted to do, it was to kill a woman. He did it with ease, he wasn’t even breathing hard when he walked away. He has been waiting to not only do it, but get away with it, his entire life.

Meanwhile black women have been dealing with that for years-being killed by white men not only in the streets, but in their bed when they are sleeping, and in their kitchen when they called the police for mental health help.

 But now it’s our turn to be effortlessly gunned down and the white christian nationalist to look away. 

. So who are you supporting and why? How can you look away? 

This administration has now given the go ahead for all dominance and supremacy of the white male to occur out-in-the-open, in broad daylight and told they have “total immunity” to do so.

Girl. You are in danger. Your privilege means absolutely nothing now. 

This past year has been one of the most complex for me as a spiritual being practicing humanism. I have spent the last year in great despair, in rage, in divisiveness, in confusion, in love, in community, in light and in being the light. 

And I have fought with myself about my role as a spiritualist, as a human, friend, partner, parent and as a business owner amidst this chaotic turbulent times.

I have had people tell me that I shouldn’t speak about politics where my business is concerned. I was told I it’s okay to speak on it, but only one on one, not in groups where it might make others feel uncomfortable.  

And I haven’t even shared in all this about the past 3 years of studying biology, neurobiology and psychology subjects such as the nervous system, nueroplasticity, various mental health topics, and how politics affects E V E R Y T H I N G! 

 I’ve also deepened my spirituality, while simultaneously getting a bit lost with it, or at least my grounding in it at certain points. My business took a hit, one. because small businesses are, but two, because I wasn’t able to be the magnetic charge to help people, when I wasn’t  landing a lot of the time myself.

I have done enormous amounts of soul searching and healing work.  

In the end, I have very deep spiritual beliefs and practices. And they are such things that  could very well make me to be an “all love and light” person. Rise about the ‘matrix’. It’s all lies. It’s all a game, type of spiritualist.

And the thing is, I do share those beliefs. I think the government is almost nothing but lies. I think both sides are wings of the same bird and when it comes down to it, I don’t think either side has any of our best interests at heart, only their own. 

I believe: what we think about, we bring about. I believe there are different dimensions and realities we all exist in all the time. I believe in some really whacky shit! I have questioned myself, my words and my actions time and again this past year. Trying to align and stay aligned with my heart and values and truths and knowledge. Staying aligned right now is a tall order for any of us.

I am also human. And I am here to experience the human form. And I will not deny what real history shows us. History not written by white men. Instead, written by men of all colors, written by women, and by people all over the gender spectrum. 

I will listen to the voices of those that have been harmed repeatedly. I will not pretend I don’t have to be a part of the ugly, of the dark. I do believe in duality. I am not all love and light. 

I am fucking disgusted by what is happening and simultaneously I will also be doing the things to hold the light. 

I will continue to learn history, and not just from the side of the winners. I will seek out the banned books, because those are the ones they really want us to stay away from because they hold the keys to what is really happening. They are the insight. 

I have created and am fostering a community of women and we are all learning how to truly be in community- to share resources, communicate with compassionate curiosity and to help each other out even when it’s inconvenient, and share the load and to explore ceremony together, as women used to do. This year we will embarking on how we can be of service to our greater community and I’m really looking forward to that. 

I continue to explore my ancestry, and pagan roots to bring that type of ritual and ceremony back into my life and honor those that came before me and learn from them, so I can help this world get back to that place of wisdom keepers, seers, herbalism, midwifery and more. 

I am exhausted by all of the information I have learned because  of all the layers that I have peeled back over the past six years. I get so overwhelmed with it. It’s so much to hold and know. And my eyes can never be shut now. I can never not know. 

I do my best to navigate when and how to use my voice best. I have found on line is not my best way, rather in person is where I do well. Looking people in the eyes, sharing energy for understanding. 

With me you will get it all because that is who I am. I’m the realest. I won’t look away. I won’t all love and light it, but I will stand my ground in spiritual practices in order hold the light through this fuckery! 

I will speak on true history and what is happening in the present. I will never support this administration. I will remain disgusted and outraged by it and I will continue to speak against It when and how I want to!

 I will be open to learning together. I will be open to trying to navigate difficult conversations and learning to do better. 

I will do my best to avoid the hate that I have held in my heart much of 2025. But I will not back away from the darkness. I am not afraid of my darkness. 

I will not let anyone tell me what to speak on or not speak on in regards to my business. Honestly, if you don’t already know where I stand, than I haven’t been honest enough and that is a problem to me. 

This has taken me 4 hours to write. I will not be editing it anymore than I have. Thank you for taking this journey with me. I have no ultimate purpose other than to speak my own truth knowledge. Perhaps it will awaken someone else. Perhaps not. Regardless don’t ever get it twisted where I stand. 

I stand on the side of HUMANITY.